How have I gotten through these past couple of months?
With a little help from my friends (plus dreams, poetry, and some fabulous Santa Fe sunsets)
Hello friends,
From mid-April through May, I've been OOO (Out of Office) for more weeks than I've been in. A lot has happened in that time.
I told you all about my family’s double medical emergencies in two previous posts, here and here. Last month I said goodbye to my step-mother, Diane, who passed away after a brief but intense illness. One of my first memories of Diane involved a book of poetry. And in this time of loss, poetry has brought me much solace. I share more about that below.
Photo by Tzivia Gover May wrapped up with me co-leading a week-long retreat on dreams, poetic writing, art, and more. I wasn't sure I'd even be able to show up for that, given all that's been going on. But I did! And it was worth the effort to board a plane so soon after my step-mom’s funeral. Immersing myself in dreams and poetry nourished my soul, and offered meaningful ways to connect with my step-mom’s memory and my raft of emotions. The fact that the retreat took place in magical Santa Fe didn't hurt either. Read on for more on that.
One of my poems from my ongoing poetry and translation project centered on retelling the Hebrew Matriarch Sarah's story was published in the inaugural issue of The Jewish Poets Collective Journal. That really lifted my spirits! Read: "The Moon, By Your Side," here or read an earlier version of the poem and my notes on how it fits into my larger project about Sarah in my other Substack publication, 'The Life of H: Sarah, Reimagined,' here.
That’s a lot, right? And those bullet points don’t even encompass all of the myriad ups and downs I’ve been navigating.
How have I gotten through all of this?
With a little (a lot!) of help from my friends. (Including so many of you, Dear Readers!!!)
The gift of poetry
These are some of the words I shared in my eulogy for Diane. As you’ll see from this excerpt, poetry played a central role in Diane and me bonding:
“I was in my twenties when Dad and Diane got together. Diane was quiet and self-possessed, and I’m from a family of big emotions and lots of talking. I wasn’t sure what to make of my dad’s new girlfriend at first. But on my birthday soon after they got together, I received a gift in the mail from my dad.
Dad usually sent a card, and maybe a check. But this was a gift-wrapped package.
I was (and am) a feminist, a cat-lover, and a poet. Let’s just say that my dad didn’t relate to any of those parts of me. And yet here I was unwrapping a book of poetry by Marge Piercy, a feminist author, with a drawing of a cat on the cover.
I instantly knew who was behind that perfect present.
That was just the beginning of me realizing some of the qualities that Diane was bringing into our lives.
Over the years I discovered that Diane quietly and consistently opened her heart to people—and pets—in need. After 9/11 she emptied the closet in her NYC apartment of all of my dad’s clothes that were stored there, and donated them to the families of victims and first responders who had lost so much. The list of charities she donated to is a mile long. But most of all she devoted her free time on weekends to caring for her 4-legged and 3-legged best friends at the Animal Rescue Fund (ARF) in Southampton. She was a passionate vegetarian until the end, one more piece of evidence of how committed she was to preventing cruelty to animals.
In the days since Diane passed, I also heard again and again from her friends and family that they don’t know anyone with a larger, kinder, or more generous heart.”
Rest in peace, Diane.
A friend shared Marge Piercy's poem 'Kaddish' with me. Coincidentally, it is also by Marge Piercy. It contains these lines:
Blessed is light, blessed is darkness,
but blessed above all else is peace,
which bears the fruits of knowledge
in its strong branches
and let us say Amein.
I hope these lines give you comfort, no matter who or what you might be grieving for.
You can read the entire poem here.
Dream Journey into poetry, and more
The Dream Journey into the Soul 5-Day retreat at the DreamingArts Studio in Santa Fe from May 26-30 was pure magic.
Together, we explored dreams through poetic writing, creating dream oracle cards, enacting dream theater, meditative musical interludes, dream tarot … and more!
Got that FOMO feeling?
Now that you know what a full and meaningful experience the May retreat at the DreamingArts Studio in Santa Fe was, you might have that feeling that you missed out on something. If so:
a) I can't blame you. The retreat was pretty darn amazing.
b) You can fix that! Sign up for our next dreamy retreat at the DreamingArts Studio in Santa Fe.
The Dreaming in Full Color weekend retreat takes place Sept. 12-14 in Santa Fe, NM, and features Dreams, Collage, Writing, and Book Arts with dream group leader, artist, and author Victoria Rabinowe and me.
Make time to write this summer
+ Join the Summer 'Stay @ Home & Write Virtual Retreat'.
Until next time …
I’m dreaming with you,
Did you know?
I have two online publications!
You are now reading ‘This Dream is a Poem,’ where I share news of dreams and writing with you.
I also have an online publication, “The Life of H: Sarah, Reimagined,” where I share my poetry, translations, and reflections as I retell the story of Sarah, the first Matriarch of Genesis.
You can subscribe free of charge to either or both of these publications. Or better yet:
Become a paid subscriber to either publication and get lots of special frills … including this:
When you sign up for an annual paid plan to either publication ($40) you get a FREE signed copy of Dreaming on the Page: Tap into Your Midnight Mind to Supercharge Your Writing.
Also: If you become a paid subscriber to one publication, I’ll automatically throw in a paid subscription to the other one for free! That’s two subscriptions for the price of one.
Beautiful tribute to Diane. May she live on in your memories, and in the poetry you read and write.